The thrill of honesty, wow. I never thought I'd see the day that this blog would surface. It feels great to be forgiven, but it's also scary because I know it's not always going to be this easy. Not everyone will be as compassionate as the people I've been talking to lately and this is hard for me to swallow or understand. I have done a lot in my life, a lot of good, but far more evil. I am a very loved person, and I have loved a lot of people.
As circumstances change, so do relationships. It's a never ending process really. But we have to keep focus on what is morally right no matter how circumstances change, and that's where I've failed miserably. It's so easy to say "well he's having a bad day, let's [insert random act of sinfullness here].. it'll make him feel better." I don't know if everyone falls into that, but I do more often than not. I want everyone to be happy, so I do that, and let myself hurt instead.
I want to be like Jesus, and if I'm going to do that I have to take care of myself which I've not been doing lately. Jesus went into the garden at a pivitol time in his life because he needed to be alone. I feel like I'm walking towards the garden and I have been for some time, but I keep getting stopped along the way. A trouble here, a relationship there.. next thing I know I'm miles away from my final destination point. Now what?
Start over, Take that first step, it could be the start of a journey of thousands of steps, or I could fall again, and it could only be a few hundred. Regardless, every journey starts with a step. A step of faith, logically speaking.
I'm not sure why I posted this, nevertheless, here it is.
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