Friendships

I was reading an article earlier on friendships and relationships and how some people struggle with anxiety and depression, especially during Christmas and the holiday season.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. What you want to do, is try to figure out which category your friend fits into. When you do, you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. You are experiencing some sort of difficulty and they are there to assist you, to provide you with guidance and support. Reason friends are able to help you physically, emotionally or spiritually, depending on your need. For those of religious beliefs, they may be considered a miracle, or a godsend. They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Reason friends are only meant to be temporary. They will, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Whether this be death, or an argument in which one of you walks away. They may disrupt your comfort level by forcing you to take a stand.

What we must remember is that our need has been met, our desire has been fulfilled and their work is done. Your question has been answered, and now it is time to move on.

Now some people come into your life for a season, because in certain times in life we are required to share, grow or learn. Friends will often come into your life and bring you peace or make you laugh. They may educate you in things you have never done before, and they usually leave you with a feeling of happiness and joy. It isn’t fake, it’s real, but it is only temporary - for a season.

These are people that later on will become acquaintances. When you meet in passing later on, you’ll smile and wave, possibly make small talk and catch up for a few minutes.

Lifetime relationships teach you lessons that will impact you forever. These relationships are very special, and are things you must build upon. These relationships are the hardest, but, when successful, leave you with a solid emotional foundation. Your responsibility is to accept the lesson, love the person, and utilize all of the other lessons that reason and seasonal friends have taught you.

The Checklist

Needs/Wants

I want to be involved in an inviting church.

I want friends who will hold me spiritually accountable.

I need to have conversations about Jesus and spirituality.

I need to be challenged

I want to feel needed.

I need & want to help in any way I can.

Dr. Pepper (2011)

Have you ever been walking and taken a sip of Dr. Pepper only to simultaneously have to sneeze?

So you inhale in preparation for said sneeze, only to choke on your mouthful of Dr. Pepper?

Then proceed to shoot it out every possible facial opening, till you're crying sticky Dr. Pepper tears?

...because I did that today...

Good day (2011)

It's a rare occurrence when just the sight if something leaves me speechless.

Last Saturday I found the market an hour before it closed, whizzed my car into a spot and was in a mighty hurry to snatch vegetables and yummy snacks.

I was covering a story for the paper and Zach wanted to go to get food for the week, so we made a date out of it.

So we arrived and we were having casual conservation, but as we get close enough to get the feel for the crowd something changed.

I took one look and stopped still.

The weather was perfect, children played in the lot,  musicians tried out songs for tips. Booths piled high with bins full of homegrown vegetables met my eyes. Freshly baked bread lined tables,  and that fresh, growing smell of countless green things tumbled together greeted my nose.  I walked slowly in, amidst tables of seedlings and cheese stands. Hunkered next to stands of fresh, local beef were fresh flower and craft stands.

I wanted to stop, right there in the entrance, to take all the toppling beauty in, for that market jolted my soul. Some sleeping part of my heart that once lived, and loved, much closer to the earth was awakened.

Even though I am thoroughly immersed in technology and the university atmosphere presently, I did spend my last few years in Kentucky. My grandparents and aunt had acres of land where I spent many summers. There were three ponds and a garden that bore bright vegetables, which we fought daily battles with ferocious bugs to cull a few, ruby-sheened tomatoes. But all of it was my delight, all of it a new world for my taking and my just-wakened little soul was keenly aware of every whisper and scent of the earth as it sidled up to greet me. The musty damp of a barn corner, the heady green scent of fresh-mown grass, the fragile perch of a butterfly in my hand.

I couldn’t have said it out right, but some hushed corner of my heart knew that my outdoor world was rife with wonder, with growth that never ceased, colors that waxed and waned, scents that came to me as if from another world.

I hunger for that in my modern, streamlined life. Sometimes, amidst a day of cars and phone calls, social networking and computers, I yearn for earthiness with something akin to homesickness.

One step though, in the Farmer's Market, and I was back in the tumbled, gorgeous world of my childhood, where every corner of creation whispered a secret I yearned to know.

That afternoon, I shook myself back to reality and grilled all kinds of tasty treats. The meal was perfection.

 I was sad to leave this small world of a place in which the wonder of my childhood greeted me at the entrance. The sight compounded all the old mystery I felt, all the remembered savor of earthy things into a few words of wonder.

Today (2011)

Could it be that it's genetic?

Or perhaps it's just my fear. 


Could be, maybe, I’m wishing


I was somewhere other than here.

Maybe it's my chemicals


Or it is nothing at all


Regardless, it doesn't matter


When my emotions take their fall

Could be, it runs in my family


Maybe it runs in my small town


Perhaps it comes just from me


Whenever I feel down



I'm probably just dramatic


It appears that I'm just weak


It’s only because there is far too much


That I hope for, long and seek



It could be I need to sleep


It's possible this, too, will pass


It could be, very soon, I’ll get better


Perhaps this madness won't last



Or maybe I'll go crazy


Perhaps I'll lose it all


It's possible I'll be fine


I'm just so conditioned to fall.

Ropes. (2011)

My elephant cycle

I read about a man who was in Africa. I'm not sure if it was leisure or work, but it isn't relevant.

What is relevant were the elephants he saw. Huge elephants being transported in a group from one place to another by a trainer.

The elephants were bound by a small rope tied around their leg. These huge elephants, large & majestic creatures, could have easily broken free from these flimsy constraints. But they did not.

The man was confused by this, so he asked the trainer, "why do these beautiful animals just stand there when they could so easily break away?"

The trainer said, "well, when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them, and at that age, it's enough to hold them.  As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never  try to break free." The man was amazed. These animals could break free at any moment from their bonds, but because they believed they couldn't, they were stuck right where they were. The powerful and gigantic creature has limited its present abilities by the limitations of its past.

Like the elephant, how many of us go through life holding onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before? How many of us refuse to attempt something new and challenging  because of our so called mindset?

Your attempt may fail, but never fail to make an attempt. Choose not to accept the false boundaries and limitations created by the past.

Love, Love, Love (2011)

This is my favorite song in the whole world. It has helped me and healed me so much. I just wanted to share it.


Andrew Peterson - "Love is a Good Thing"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cKPF50T15w
Here is the video if you'd like to listen :)


It knocked me down, 
it dragged me out, 
it left me there for dead. 


It took all the freedom I wanted and gave me something else instead. 


It blew my mind, 
it bled me dry, 
it hit me like a long goodbye, 


and nobody here knows better than I that it’s a good thing.


Love is a good thing. 


It’ll fall like rain on your parade,
laugh at the plans that you tried to make, 


it’ll wear you down till your heart just breaks and it’s a good thing. 


Love is a good thing.

It’ll wake you up in the middle of the night, 
it’ll take just a little too much. 
It’ll burn you like a cinder till you’re tender to the touch. 


It’ll chase you down, 
swallow you whole, 
it’ll make your blood run hot and cold. 


Like a thief in the night, it’ll steal your soul, and that’s a good thing. 


Love is a good thing. 


It’ll follow you down to the ruin of your great divide, 
and open the wounds that you tried to hide. 


And there in the rubble of the heart that died you’ll find a good thing. 


Love is a good thing. 


Take cover, the end is near. 
Take cover, but do not fear. 


It’ll break your will, 
it’ll change your mind, 


it’ll loose all the chains of the ties that bind. 


If you’re lucky you’ll never make it out alive, and that’s a good thing. 


Love is a good thing. 


It can hurt like a blast from a hand grenade, 
When all that used to matter is blown away. 


There in the middle of the mess it made - you’ll find a good thing.


Yes, it’s worth every penny of the price you paid - It’s a good thing. 


Love is a good thing, - do not fear.